Overloading

ACCOUNTING . BUS LAW. MCRO. MANAGEMENT.

-FML-

It seems like year 12 all over again, only this time i've really stepped into the shoes of that typical cbs kid sitting at the back of every class not uttering a single word of knowledge throughout classes. The kid who goes on a limb and improvises on everything, studies just before the sac and scrapes through with mild satisfaction and a cannot careless attitude. Well actually the only diff is, i don't noe if i'm ever gonna scrap through this hurdle. It is clear to me that i may have overestimated my own abilities, mentally i mean...I guess the situation i'm in right now leaves me in... one word - deepshit......yeps no better word to describe it. 

But anyways, today was kinda nice, just being able to talk to lina one on one and busing the 1.5 hour trip back home with her. Guess her presence made it worth the while. It is like a reconciliation only at a very deep level. It's the kind of friendship that you would pay a million bucks to have, no.. actually maybe more than that. I'm sincerely and genuinely thankful for her and her awesomeness =] really thankful. 

So after the bus ride, i got home and for some reason, i was not hungry at all.. not like i usually would be after a long day of study. Uni was tiring, studying was draining and surprisingly my appetite followed suit. I had no urge to stuff my face at all... I'm guessing maybe it's the sudden overload, or maybe its just that im growing older and no longer have that capacity to stuff a cow down my tummy... in other words you could say that it is almost analogous to putting your all time favorite hobby right in front of yourself ( in my case.. eating) and yet no feelings (in this case hunger) are aroused. Oh sighs* 

Alright, gtg sleep. Nites!

Dearest polar bear, I don't know what's happening to me but its making me go insane. lotsa love xc. 

A Revelation...

Here it is. Smack bam. Starring at me right in the face all this while and i never thought of it!
For the last 5 months i though that i knew exactly why living so many miles apart made me worried sick, and yet today the truth hit me... the real reason i didn't want him to go was because he was my support. I made him everything i had to lean on before i could even say no to it. And, sure part of the contributing factors may be with regards to some trust issues and all that finding someone else kind of stuff, but really, the truth of it all boils down to the fact that i'm losing my pillar and it is irreplaceable given such short notice. Ok maybe not short since i knew this would happen from a year ago.. but still time goes by so swiftly that in the midst of this roller coaster, one does not have the time to stop and think where he/she is headed next. Do we?
Perhaps since I've mentioned the "trust issues"; i might as well just point out a few things that i have learnt... Sometimes, a relationship may be only as wobbly as you think it is.. and only ever as untrustworthy as you think it is / can be. And why may this be the case? Well the truth is, when you think that he can cheat on you, means you'll think of all ways that he might do so! Fact is, any girl would be able to think of 1000000000 ways that a guy could betray her, for some not so often, but for others maybe on every other minute, one of these thoughts would just gently creep into the brain and the heart and shake every single thing you once thought you knew. How is it that we girls let such creepy thoughts slip into us ? I guess that it is probably the female instincts that leaves a hole for such thoughts to come through, and so being unable to stop it, the only way left is to get rid of it. Its tormenting and draining but it's face-able. A deep breathe, a few cups of tea and a nice box of branded chocolate, in bed, covered with a cashmere snowy white blanket would do the temporary trick. Note - It is only temporary, as for permanent solutions, i've not yet found one. But this works well enough for me at the moment. So untill a need for a permanent medicine to this bitter taste comes up, i shall stick to what i've figured out.
So here it is... the revelation to why most girls can't stop thinking nonsense ( btw this is not applicable to those who can say that they trust their dates a 100% - because these people must be angels to be so perfect.)

I need a cup of tea and my polar bear with you next to me...

Tiny Teddies =P

Just another fantasy: 

I'm sitting at my comp and staring into blank space, just wondering what it would be like if i lived in a world of tiny teddies and polar bears, with snowflakes all around. And right in the middle of that perfect scene would be my house made of cookies and cream ice cream standing alone in the blistering cold weather and a warm chocolate fountain as my fire place and heater. HMMMMMMMM how i wish it could be real =]

Anyway back into reality, I'm currently up to chapter 7 (with 5 more chapters to go) in my mission to finish LEARNING not even revising (lol) all that will be examined on friday =D But it's alright, come to think of it, it is really not as bad as i was expecting it to be ! i think i can pass afterall! =] So something to consider next time *notes to self* is to keep up with work and don't fall 12 chapters behind ! yeahhhh... LOl

Well apart from work, i've been chilling and listening JD's new song - Getaway~~~~~Best song ever, its the first on my playlist (on the right->) and has been on repeat ever since i first heard it 2 days ago =]

Why don’t you walk away
There’s always a fight
Don’t treat you right
It’s been a long day yeah
So why don’t you come with me
It’s just for the night
We’ll drop out of sight and getaway (oh oh)

If you want then I’ve got it
When you need a place to hide yeah yeah
From the weather, I’m your shelter
So baby come inside
I’ll be your midnight escape
When it’s too much I’ll be your
Geta-geta your getaway (ay)
I’m here to numb all the pain
When life just sucks
I’ll be your geta-geta your getaway (ay ay)

I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway
I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway

Now baby you don’t have to go
Stay here with me, between the sheets
Taking it slow..
And I’ll be here and when he ain’t coming home
And loving you
How dare he leave you alone (alone)

If you want then I’ve got it
When you need a place to hide yeah yeah
From the weather, I’m your shelter
So baby come inside
I’ll be your midnight escape
When it’s too much I’ll be your
Geta-geta your getaway (ay)
I’m here to numb all the pain
When life just sucks
I’ll be your geta-geta your getaway (ay ay)

Tears falling down
And I’ll dry them up for you
Knees to the ground
But I picked you up and you know (you know)
I’m always here
And you know, you know
I won’t disappear
Tears falling down

I’ll be your midnight escape
I’ll be your midnight escape
When it’s too much I’ll be your
Geta-geta your getaway (ay)
I’m here to numb all the pain
When life just sucks
I’ll be your geta-geta your getaway (ay ay)

I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway
I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway

I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway
I’ll be your getaway, Your getaway
Your getaway, Your getaway
I’ma stop cause I ran out of things to say..

When life takes it's toll on me, please be my midnight escape...Let's take your car, drop out of sight and getaway...just for awhile...

Procrastination.... as usual?

Well this is surprisingly the 2nd day in a row that i am on my blog now=] So once again, my reason for being here is none other than : Procrastination ... the big "P" word...
9 days left to exams and i'm still procrastinating... can i just say, this is EXACTLY what uni does to you!
Anyway, today i went for another morning exercise =] it started out as a rather gloomy day -having the cars' tire punctured on the way to exercise and getting scolded by my dad for wanting to play soccer !!!!- geez what a great start eh!? But it turned out to be not so bad when we ended up at MELISSAs for a nice bruncheon~~ A nice plate of Egg Florentines with one of the best hash browns i've ever tasted !! and of course a filling cheesy plate of  chicken risotto =] YUM YUMMMM !! -Best meal ever... especially when you're feeling extremely hungry and can sort of eat a whole cow single-handedly!!!
So altogether, the day turned out to be pretty good, with me ending up in doncaster library, soldiering through a couple of accounting questions and catching up on the numerous weeks of lectures which i "painfully and oh sooo unwillingly" missed *Coughs & chokes* since... mmm....mmm... alright well, i dont really rmbr since when i started missing LOL 
Well thats it for today as i should and must and will try to go and study for my Acc & Fin exam on friday >___<


I wish.. i wish.. upon my guardian angel that i had a magic telephone with free calls to you =]

Ok, so i've come to a point where studying is no longer working too well for me and hence my sudden need to blog. 

Lets see... my exams are literally 10 days away and surprisingly i am not feeling the "pressure" or any "intensity" given the short time span before me. Why why why??? Did year 12 really burn me out that much? It's the only thing i could think of as some sort of a logical reason as to why I have deteriorated into such a state? What happened to my brain ? Is it in hibernation or is it just on a little holiday down in Hawaii? Because frankly speaking ... I am in desperate need of it and the skill involved in cramming right now right here, or else i shall be waving goodbye to my passing mark...
Here's the train of thought : I've got 10 days to my afc exam...and  i've got just about 12 chapters to cover and revise for... reckon 1 chapter a day will do.... ..LOLOLOL--------------------- Will it?  NO of course not! what am i thinking? Am i insane? If I were really able to do so, i would be sitting in place of a nerdy scholar in Harvard studying some intense course like medicine....Yeh right! 

So what is wrong with me !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH =____=  

*brain flickers in instability caused by wondering too much* 

                        --ZAAAP--

*brain dies due to a short circuit*

and thats the end of me 

Oh Sigh~

To my angel : I know you're reading this right now, so I wish... I wish... for a warm frizzly polar bear that can be my heater in this cold...=] pls give me one? *shivers*