its 11.57 am and i just got off the phone with ben. Seeing as i cant get myself to sleep just yet, i decided to return to my fav place~ My blog~.

Todays devotion passage comes from Mathew 5:13-16

You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men.
You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on a stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.
In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven.

Hmmm i really like this paragraph. It does make me think alot deeper. We are the salt of the earth. If we lose our "saltiness", how can we be made "salty" again? Question is can we ever? I cant help but wonder, when it says "it is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men" does that mean that once we lose this faith or this passion, even though we can regain and renew it, it'll never be as "salty" as before? Or does it mean that once we lose track and go astray, we can never be used again for God's work and his glory? And then it goes on to call us the "light of the world". But personally, quite so often i find myself ending up as the lamp under the bowl, hiding beneath the surface, hiding the "light" in the darkness of the world. Is it shyness? or embarrassment? or am i ashamed? 0.0
I asked myself why and tried to give myself an answer but even i dont know the answer.
So I thought to myself, if i was asked to stand up on the highest platform closest to me amongst a big crowd of people, regardless of the number of non-believers standing around me, and jump up there and scream out loud that "I LOVE JESUS!!!" ....would i be able to?
Honestly, i wouldn't be able to. But is this what god means when he wants us to show our faith and not hide or be ashamed? Is the reason for me not being able to do such a thing - the fear of being embarrassed? or the fear of people judging me? or the fear of how many non believers surround me ? i dont know. I honestly don't. But maybe one day... i'll try it. One day...